E for Enjoy

The last pillar in the happiness formula "CHOOSE" is E for Enjoy-It is essential to make yourself get off the treadmill daily to take time to enjoy what you are doing-when you are doing it-This means enjoying your work through focused attention to the task at hand-notice I didn"t say tasks-we need to spend more time on one job at a time-one phone call, one staff catch up, one email-not all three at once!Enjoying your meals or coffee breaks through consciously enjoying the yummy flavours and textures, the time to relax ; Enjoy your commute to and from work-listening to music, admiring any scenery then finally enjoying your home when you get there and giving loved ones full attention-most of us have wandering minds-at work thinking-I must be a better parent/partner while at home thinking I must be  a better boss/employee-a sure fire  recipe for spiralling mood and productivity-give mindfulness a go and you may be surprised at the difference it can make.
What helps you live more in the moment?

S is for Strengths

Most of us are very bad at knowing our strengths-your individual attributes or qualities.We are much more likely to be experts on what our weaknesses are-even if we don't verbalise our foibles to others,we definitely do to ourselves using that nasty little Miss negative internal voice.( Yes-women are worse at this than men-hence the use of "Miss").

So -the first step to using personal Strengths is to be aware of them-then we can begin to use that knowledge to capitalise on them and plan our happy work life around them.It is very freeing to accept yourself and use the strengths you have -rather than beat yourself up about what you are not so good at or inclined to.

Martin Seligman-the founding father of the Learned Optimism movement and Positive

Psychology has a free online test that you can undertake to assist you in knowing your

strengths. The test is called the Values In Action Signature Strengths and is available free at

http://www.authentichappiness.sas.upenn.edu/

What are your top 5 strengths and are you using them in your life?

Next Step-Others

Where was I before I was rudely interrupted by 5 weeks away? Oh yes-back to the CHOOSE model of happiness.

The next letter is O-for others.Strong relationships with others are a key ingredient to happiness in life."Other" people include family, friends, co-workers, employees, bosses-even pets. Humans are social creatures and we need and seek the warmth and affirmation that comes from having people we can relate to, confide in and share our life with.

If you are doing an audit on your happiness-consider your important relationships- at work are you fostering, developing and manintaining good professional relationships? At home are you giving your significant others the attention and time they warrant? Be deeply honest with yourself.It matters.

Next Step to Happiness-Optimism

Next installment of the CHOOSE Happiness at Work Model is O for Optimism.
(I have covered C- Clarity of direction in life and knowing where you want to be in life and work and H-Health in previous blogs)

Optimism is defined as having a  positive attitude about yourself, your future and your world.
Optimism is not just about taking a glass half full view of the world-Someone,very sensibly, said recently that a glass half full of water is also half empty.Life is full of plenty of challenges to tackle either negatively or positively. Some issues are also outside of our control so a degree of realistic thinking is needed along with a postive approach. Your tendency to be optimistic or pessimistic is pretty much part of your personality- a factor of family genes as well as how you have seen people tackle problems over the years when you were a small person. The key message about optimism is that it is incredibly important-if you do nothing else on this little Regater walk up the path to choosing happiness at work-do optimism. Optimistic thinkers are not only happier, they are healthier, more successful, have better relationships blah blah blah. So even if you are usually a paid up, full time and founding member of the temple of doom club- practice turning some of those negative thoughts into a more positive ones, on a daily basis.


As the Dalai Lama said

"The central method for achieving a happier life is to train your mind in a daily practice that weakens negative attitudes and strengthens positive ones"


I would love to hear your thoughts on optimism.

Open the gate to happiness at work-Step 3

Did I mention that the Happiness model that I am promoting is the one used by Australia's very own Dr Happy-Dr Tim Sharp? Tim is Chief Happiness Officer of The Happiness Institute, his organization that helps individuals and companies enhance happiness -with stunning personal and fiscal results. I studied with Dr Sharp last year and think his model is tops.

So step three on the model is HEALTH-repeat after me-you cannot achieve long lasting and productive happiness in your work if you neglect your health.

Too many of us work too long-cramming a few days work into a day, not eating well, not exercising and then wonder why we can't sleep properly, can't switch off thinking about work and why our kids and friends and partners need to be reminded of our names .Working too hard and long keeps us ramped up on adrenalin, technology ensures we can be contacted at all hours - throw in some financial stress and pesky demanding  bosses and colleagues and surprise surprise-before we  know it we are burned out , bitter and battered-physically and emotionally. If you keep this up-you will be "spat off the wheel" and it will not be pleasant or pretty.

This is the catch 22 of happiness- leading the flourishing and rewarding life you want to lead-as determined from your visioning activity and plan-will be impossible-unless you have energy and stamina that comes with healthy living-eating well, staying fit, relaxing and recuperating well. Conversely, the healthier you are , the more you can cope with life challenges , bounce back from them and stick to your happiness resolutions.

Successful, energetic , passionate people often do work long hours and work extremely hard- however the ones ,that can sustain that lifestyle,  will always have a health regime that they stick to religiously. High performance demands quality fuel and regular rest and maintenance- in cars, racehorses and humans!!

So sit down and do a health audit- how well are you sleeping, how much exercise are you doing, how do you feel emotionally, is your diet full of healthy and nutritious food, do you plan decent recovery times and activities ?

Be brutally honest and then brutal with yourself in designing your "healthy life = happiness" plan-make sure you include exercise and activity, healthy nutritious food and rest and recovery activities.Then start following it straight away- no time to delay or excuses please.

"Those who think they have no time for bodily exercise will sooner or later have to find time for illness"

Edward Stanley

Let me know what your top health tips are as well as if you have story of being spat off the wheel and how you recovered.

Open the gate to happiness at work-Step 2

So- now you have your vision of how you want to be living in 5 years-it may include where you live, who you live with, how you work,what sort of work you are doing,  where you work, how much you work, what places you have visited, skills mastered and hobbies rediscovered-a visioning exercise can lead to wonderful discoveries of who you really are and what you really want-as mentioned before,many of us are on auto pilot and don't get the time or make the time to revisit what we want from life and plan how to get it.
The visioning  helps you get clarity and direction.

So step 2 to happiness at work:-

• Look at your vision and work out what things can be achieved straight away, in the short term and then in the longer term-pick out what really matters to you-even if it looks scary-like career change/house change/partner change!
• If there is very little you would change-fantastic-You would already be content with your lot , and this would include your work-we spend so much time at work that if all is fine and dandy in your world then you have mastered the art of thriving at work. (be it paid or unpaid)
• If there are only a few tweaks then start plotting what needs to be done first and how to do it- additional training? a mentor? a sabbatical needed? 
• If there are major changes to be made-congratulations on coming to this realisation and being brave and honest enough to admit it.Next choose an area that seems achievable and begin to explore your options.

So for the time being ,dear Redgaters, sit down and tease out what issues you can begin to focus on and what steps are needed overcome the issue.

It goes without saying that a leadership coach can help enormously with this step- as an objective and confidential sounding board and guide.

Open the gate to happiness at work-Step 1

OK-now that you have decided to ditch being bitter and twisted as part of your 2010 resolutions/or as result of post Christmas miserable family or holiday experience / or spurred on by a sad and reluctant return to the same old miserable job/workplace- read on to embrace happiness at work-Yes -it does exist and it is possible.You too,can look like little Coco!!( I lie- maybe not as unlined and hopefully with more hair)

The first step is to work out exactly what you want from life.It is time to ask yourself some searching questions- where are you headed ? what sort of life would you like to be leading? where do you want to be in terms of career and life in 2 years, in 5 years?How do you want to be earning your living?

In the coaching trade this is known as a visioning exercise- and always conducted at the the beginning of a coaching program.Before you all switch off ( or blog off is probably the correct term) in resistance to such questions let me remind you that most people put more time and effort into planning their holidays than they do in planning and managing their careers and lives-If you skip the important step of truly examining your goals and dreams you will skip getting anywhere near where you really want to be.

It can be very illuminating,surprising and even comforting to spend some time doing some visioning. One of my 2009 clients rediscovered that he had really deep down and years before life( uni, job,wife,kids,family and self expectations etc ) took over- wanted to be a writer- not the stressed out CE that he was- This does not mean he automatically ditched the 6 figure income and headed for a room of his own to write -but it did spur him to do a creative writing workshop and start write some articles. Another client, reported the following:-

"Thank you for our session yesterday ,Jan. I found the visualisation exercise quite comforting - maybe because there seems to be so much uncertainty in the world at the moment. It made me feel that everything will pan out OK in the long run."

This client discovered from our visioning session that she was doing exactly what she wanted , yet needed to stay brave and focused on her plan, due to the GFC .A very common reality for 2009 clients.

So get out the diary/journal and put on some relaxing music-find your most comfortable spot and wave your magic wand ( your pencil or pen) and write or draw how you want your life to look .There are no constraints ( not yet anyway-reality will be addressed in the next blog) .

What have you come up with?