The Story of the Nothing Box

Participants in the leadership and management programs that I am involved in love all of the program and workshop content (clever and appreciative little people that they are!) I can’t take all of the credit though –that must go to my wonderful guest speakers! One such gem is Avril Henry- who teaches the importance of understanding and appreciating diversity in the workplace- be it gender, generation or cultural diversity.

By far the most favourite bit is about how men and women think and communicate differently (Yes –it is true!) Men are much more single minded where as women not only multi task but multi think. Avril gives a wonderful analogy to highlight this. If you took the top off a man’s head and looked inside his brain -one can see a series of boxes- a “sport”  box, a “fishing or hobby “ box , a “family” box, a “work” box, a “ sex “ box, and a “nothing” box. Men have one box open at a time and we (females) are not welcome in that box. It is not our box. If the work box is open then that is what he is thinking of, if the sport box is open then that is the only focus .If the “nothing” box is open then that is genuinely what he is thinking of-“nothing” and that is fine-It doesn’t mean anything is wrong as many women assume. If you ask what your male partner is thinking and he says nothing-he means nothing! That is just his way of thinking.

Conversely if you looked inside a woman’s brain you see a big ball of string all interconnected so that women can be thinking of work, family, friends, TV shows, books, gossip etc all at once. We rarely have nothing on our mind- So if you are having relationship angst around how your man (and male work colleagues) communicates, it may be helpful to consider what box is open and respect that nothing box!

It is not uncommon after the workshop for participants to ask Avril to go home with them and explain the nothing box to their wives or girlfriends. One participant felt it was a message worthy of national broadcasting and inclusion in all school curriculums-so thrilled he was to have his thinking of nothing moments validated and decriminalised.

Stay tuned for the next instalment-The Story of the Diminishing Daily Word Usage.